Kabanata Kabanata 20 · THE MINISTER IN A MAZE
. THE MINISTER IN A MAZE
As the minister departed, in advance of Hester Prynne and little Pearl,
he threw a backward glance, half expecting that he should discover only
some faintly traced features or outline of the mother and the child,
slowly fading into the twilight of the woods. So great a vicissitude in
his life could not at once be received as real. But there was Hester,
clad in her gray robe, still standing beside the tree-trunk, which some
blast had overthrown a long antiquity ago, and which time had ever
since been covering with moss, so that these two fated ones, with
earth’s heaviest burden on them, might there sit down together, and
find a single hour’s rest and solace. And there was Pearl, too, lightly
dancing from the margin of the brook—now that the intrusive third
person was gone—and taking her old place by her mother’s side. So the
minister had not fallen asleep and dreamed!
In order to free his mind from this indistinctness and duplicity of
impression, which vexed it with a strange disquietude, he recalled and
more thoroughly defined the plans which Hester and himself had sketched
for their departure. It had been determined between them that the Old
World, with its crowds and cities, offered them a more eligible shelter
and concealment than the wilds of New England or all America, with its
alternatives of an Indian wigwam, or the few settlements of Europeans
scattered thinly along the sea-board. Not to speak of the clergyman’s
health, so inadequate to sustain the hardships of a forest life, his
native gifts, his culture, and his entire development would secure him
a home only in the midst of civilization and refinement; the higher the
state the more delicately adapted to it the man. In furtherance of this
choice, it so happened that a ship lay in the harbour; one of those
unquestionable cruisers, frequent at that day, which, without being
absolutely outlaws of the deep, yet roamed over its surface with a
remarkable irresponsibility of character. This vessel had recently
arrived from the Spanish Main, and within three days’ time would sail
for Bristol. Hester Prynne—whose vocation, as a self-enlisted Sister of
Charity, had brought her acquainted with the captain and crew—could
take upon herself to secure the passage of two individuals and a child
with all the secrecy which circumstances rendered more than desirable.
The minister had inquired of Hester, with no little interest, the
precise time at which the vessel might be expected to depart. It would
probably be on the fourth day from the present. “This is most
fortunate!” he had then said to himself. Now, why the Reverend Mr.
Dimmesdale considered it so very fortunate we hesitate to reveal.
Nevertheless—to hold nothing back from the reader—it was because, on
the third day from the present, he was to preach the Election Sermon;
and, as such an occasion formed an honourable epoch in the life of a
New England Clergyman, he could not have chanced upon a more suitable
mode and time of terminating his professional career. “At least, they
shall say of me,” thought this exemplary man, “that I leave no public
duty unperformed or ill-performed!” Sad, indeed, that an introspection
so profound and acute as this poor minister’s should be so miserably
deceived! We have had, and may still have, worse things to tell of him;
but none, we apprehend, so pitiably weak; no evidence, at once so
slight and irrefragable, of a subtle disease that had long since begun
to eat into the real substance of his character. No man, for any
considerable period, can wear one face to himself and another to the
multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may be the
true.
The excitement of Mr. Dimmesdale’s feelings as he returned from his
interview with Hester, lent him unaccustomed physical energy, and
hurried him townward at a rapid pace. The pathway among the woods
seemed wilder, more uncouth with its rude natural obstacles, and less
trodden by the foot of man, than he remembered it on his outward
journey. But he leaped across the plashy places, thrust himself through
the clinging underbrush, climbed the ascent, plunged into the hollow,
and overcame, in short, all the difficulties of the track, with an
unweariable activity that astonished him. He could not but recall how
feebly, and with what frequent pauses for breath he had toiled over the
same ground, only two days before. As he drew near the town, he took an
impression of change from the series of familiar objects that presented
themselves. It seemed not yesterday, not one, not two, but many days,
or even years ago, since he had quitted them. There, indeed, was each
former trace of the street, as he remembered it, and all the
peculiarities of the houses, with the due multitude of gable-peaks, and
a weather-cock at every point where his memory suggested one. Not the
less, however, came this importunately obtrusive sense of change. The
same was true as regarded the acquaintances whom he met, and all the
well-known shapes of human life, about the little town. They looked
neither older nor younger now; the beards of the aged were no whiter,
nor could the creeping babe of yesterday walk on his feet today; it
was impossible to describe in what respect they differed from the
individuals on whom he had so recently bestowed a parting glance; and
yet the minister’s deepest sense seemed to inform him of their
mutability. A similar impression struck him most remarkably as he
passed under the walls of his own church. The edifice had so very
strange, and yet so familiar an aspect, that Mr. Dimmesdale’s mind
vibrated between two ideas; either that he had seen it only in a dream
hitherto, or that he was merely dreaming about it now.
This phenomenon, in the various shapes which it assumed, indicated no
external change, but so sudden and important a change in the spectator
of the familiar scene, that the intervening space of a single day had
operated on his consciousness like the lapse of years. The minister’s
own will, and Hester’s will, and the fate that grew between them, had
wrought this transformation. It was the same town as heretofore, but
the same minister returned not from the forest. He might have said to
the friends who greeted him—“I am not the man for whom you take me! I
left him yonder in the forest, withdrawn into a secret dell, by a mossy
tree trunk, and near a melancholy brook! Go, seek your minister, and
see if his emaciated figure, his thin cheek, his white, heavy,
pain-wrinkled brow, be not flung down there, like a cast-off garment!”
His friends, no doubt, would still have insisted with him—“Thou art
thyself the man!” but the error would have been their own, not his.
Before Mr. Dimmesdale reached home, his inner man gave him other
evidences of a revolution in the sphere of thought and feeling. In
truth, nothing short of a total change of dynasty and moral code, in
that interior kingdom, was adequate to account for the impulses now
communicated to the unfortunate and startled minister. At every step he
was incited to do some strange, wild, wicked thing or other, with a
sense that it would be at once involuntary and intentional, in spite of
himself, yet growing out of a profounder self than that which opposed
the impulse. For instance, he met one of his own deacons. The good old
man addressed him with the paternal affection and patriarchal privilege
which his venerable age, his upright and holy character, and his
station in the church, entitled him to use and, conjoined with this,
the deep, almost worshipping respect, which the minister’s professional
and private claims alike demanded. Never was there a more beautiful
example of how the majesty of age and wisdom may comport with the
obeisance and respect enjoined upon it, as from a lower social rank,
and inferior order of endowment, towards a higher. Now, during a
conversation of some two or three moments between the Reverend Mr.
Dimmesdale and this excellent and hoary-bearded deacon, it was only by
the most careful self-control that the former could refrain from
uttering certain blasphemous suggestions that rose into his mind,
respecting the communion-supper. He absolutely trembled and turned pale
as ashes, lest his tongue should wag itself in utterance of these
horrible matters, and plead his own consent for so doing, without his
having fairly given it. And, even with this terror in his heart, he
could hardly avoid laughing, to imagine how the sanctified old
patriarchal deacon would have been petrified by his minister’s impiety.
Again, another incident of the same nature. Hurrying along the street,
the Reverend Mr. Dimmesdale encountered the eldest female member of his
church, a most pious and exemplary old dame, poor, widowed, lonely, and
with a heart as full of reminiscences about her dead husband and
children, and her dead friends of long ago, as a burial-ground is full
of storied gravestones. Yet all this, which would else have been such
heavy sorrow, was made almost a solemn joy to her devout old soul, by
religious consolations and the truths of Scripture, wherewith she had
fed herself continually for more than thirty years. And since Mr.
Dimmesdale had taken her in charge, the good grandam’s chief earthly
comfort—which, unless it had been likewise a heavenly comfort, could
have been none at all—was to meet her pastor, whether casually, or of
set purpose, and be refreshed with a word of warm, fragrant,
heaven-breathing Gospel truth, from his beloved lips, into her dulled,
but rapturously attentive ear. But, on this occasion, up to the moment
of putting his lips to the old woman’s ear, Mr. Dimmesdale, as the
great enemy of souls would have it, could recall no text of Scripture,
nor aught else, except a brief, pithy, and, as it then appeared to him,
unanswerable argument against the immortality of the human soul. The
instilment thereof into her mind would probably have caused this aged
sister to drop down dead, at once, as by the effect of an intensely
poisonous infusion. What he really did whisper, the minister could
never afterwards recollect. There was, perhaps, a fortunate disorder in
his utterance, which failed to impart any distinct idea to the good
widow’s comprehension, or which Providence interpreted after a method
of its own. Assuredly, as the minister looked back, he beheld an
expression of divine gratitude and ecstasy that seemed like the shine
of the celestial city on her face, so wrinkled and ashy pale.
Again, a third instance. After parting from the old church member, he
met the youngest sister of them all. It was a maiden newly-won—and won
by the Reverend Mr. Dimmesdale’s own sermon, on the Sabbath after his
vigil—to barter the transitory pleasures of the world for the heavenly
hope that was to assume brighter substance as life grew dark around
her, and which would gild the utter gloom with final glory. She was
fair and pure as a lily that had bloomed in Paradise. The minister knew
well that he was himself enshrined within the stainless sanctity of her
heart, which hung its snowy curtains about his image, imparting to
religion the warmth of love, and to love a religious purity. Satan,
that afternoon, had surely led the poor young girl away from her
mother’s side, and thrown her into the pathway of this sorely tempted,
or—shall we not rather say?—this lost and desperate man. As she drew
nigh, the arch-fiend whispered him to condense into small compass, and
drop into her tender bosom a germ of evil that would be sure to blossom
darkly soon, and bear black fruit betimes. Such was his sense of power
over this virgin soul, trusting him as she did, that the minister felt
potent to blight all the field of innocence with but one wicked look,
and develop all its opposite with but a word. So—with a mightier
struggle than he had yet sustained—he held his Geneva cloak before his
face, and hurried onward, making no sign of recognition, and leaving
the young sister to digest his rudeness as she might. She ransacked her
conscience—which was full of harmless little matters, like her pocket
or her work-bag—and took herself to task, poor thing! for a thousand
imaginary faults, and went about her household duties with swollen
eyelids the next morning.
Before the minister had time to celebrate his victory over this last
temptation, he was conscious of another impulse, more ludicrous, and
almost as horrible. It was—we blush to tell it—it was to stop short in
the road, and teach some very wicked words to a knot of little Puritan
children who were playing there, and had but just begun to talk.
Denying himself this freak, as unworthy of his cloth, he met a drunken
seaman, one of the ship’s crew from the Spanish Main. And here, since
he had so valiantly forborne all other wickedness, poor Mr. Dimmesdale
longed at least to shake hands with the tarry blackguard, and recreate
himself with a few improper jests, such as dissolute sailors so abound
with, and a volley of good, round, solid, satisfactory, and
heaven-defying oaths! It was not so much a better principle, as partly
his natural good taste, and still more his buckramed habit of clerical
decorum, that carried him safely through the latter crisis.
“What is it that haunts and tempts me thus?” cried the minister to
himself, at length, pausing in the street, and striking his hand
against his forehead.
“Am I mad? or am I given over utterly to the fiend? Did I make a
contract with him in the forest, and sign it with my blood? And does he
now summon me to its fulfilment, by suggesting the performance of every
wickedness which his most foul imagination can conceive?”
At the moment when the Reverend Mr. Dimmesdale thus communed with
himself, and struck his forehead with his hand, old Mistress Hibbins,
the reputed witch-lady, is said to have been passing by. She made a
very grand appearance, having on a high head-dress, a rich gown of
velvet, and a ruff done up with the famous yellow starch, of which Anne
Turner, her especial friend, had taught her the secret, before this
last good lady had been hanged for Sir Thomas Overbury’s murder.
Whether the witch had read the minister’s thoughts or no, she came to a
full stop, looked shrewdly into his face, smiled craftily, and—though
little given to converse with clergymen—began a conversation.
“So, reverend sir, you have made a visit into the forest,” observed the
witch-lady, nodding her high head-dress at him. “The next time I pray
you to allow me only a fair warning, and I shall be proud to bear you
company. Without taking overmuch upon myself my good word will go far
towards gaining any strange gentleman a fair reception from yonder
potentate you wot of.”
“I profess, madam,” answered the clergyman, with a grave obeisance,
such as the lady’s rank demanded, and his own good breeding made
imperative—“I profess, on my conscience and character, that I am
utterly bewildered as touching the purport of your words! I went not
into the forest to seek a potentate, neither do I, at any future time,
design a visit thither, with a view to gaining the favour of such
personage. My one sufficient object was to greet that pious friend of
mine, the Apostle Eliot, and rejoice with him over the many precious
souls he hath won from heathendom!”
“Ha, ha, ha!” cackled the old witch-lady, still nodding her high
head-dress at the minister. “Well, well! we must needs talk thus in the
daytime! You carry it off like an old hand! But at midnight, and in the
forest, we shall have other talk together!”
She passed on with her aged stateliness, but often turning back her
head and smiling at him, like one willing to recognise a secret
intimacy of connexion.
“Have I then sold myself,” thought the minister, “to the fiend whom, if
men say true, this yellow-starched and velveted old hag has chosen for
her prince and master?”
The wretched minister! He had made a bargain very like it! Tempted by a
dream of happiness, he had yielded himself with deliberate choice, as
he had never done before, to what he knew was deadly sin. And the
infectious poison of that sin had been thus rapidly diffused throughout
his moral system. It had stupefied all blessed impulses, and awakened
into vivid life the whole brotherhood of bad ones. Scorn, bitterness,
unprovoked malignity, gratuitous desire of ill, ridicule of whatever
was good and holy, all awoke to tempt, even while they frightened him.
And his encounter with old Mistress Hibbins, if it were a real
incident, did but show its sympathy and fellowship with wicked mortals,
and the world of perverted spirits.
He had by this time reached his dwelling on the edge of the
burial-ground, and, hastening up the stairs, took refuge in his study.
The minister was glad to have reached this shelter, without first
betraying himself to the world by any of those strange and wicked
eccentricities to which he had been continually impelled while passing
through the streets. He entered the accustomed room, and looked around
him on its books, its windows, its fireplace, and the tapestried
comfort of the walls, with the same perception of strangeness that had
haunted him throughout his walk from the forest dell into the town and
thitherward. Here he had studied and written; here gone through fast
and vigil, and come forth half alive; here striven to pray; here borne
a hundred thousand agonies! There was the Bible, in its rich old
Hebrew, with Moses and the Prophets speaking to him, and God’s voice
through all.
There on the table, with the inky pen beside it, was an unfinished
sermon, with a sentence broken in the midst, where his thoughts had
ceased to gush out upon the page two days before. He knew that it was
himself, the thin and white-cheeked minister, who had done and suffered
these things, and written thus far into the Election Sermon! But he
seemed to stand apart, and eye this former self with scornful pitying,
but half-envious curiosity. That self was gone. Another man had
returned out of the forest—a wiser one—with a knowledge of hidden
mysteries which the simplicity of the former never could have reached.
A bitter kind of knowledge that!
While occupied with these reflections, a knock came at the door of the
study, and the minister said, “Come in!”—not wholly devoid of an idea
that he might behold an evil spirit. And so he did! It was old Roger
Chillingworth that entered. The minister stood white and speechless,
with one hand on the Hebrew Scriptures, and the other spread upon his
breast.
“Welcome home, reverend sir,” said the physician. “And how found you
that godly man, the Apostle Eliot? But methinks, dear sir, you look
pale, as if the travel through the wilderness had been too sore for
you. Will not my aid be requisite to put you in heart and strength to
preach your Election Sermon?”
“Nay, I think not so,” rejoined the Reverend Mr. Dimmesdale. “My
journey, and the sight of the holy Apostle yonder, and the free air
which I have breathed have done me good, after so long confinement in
my study. I think to need no more of your drugs, my kind physician,
good though they be, and administered by a friendly hand.”
All this time Roger Chillingworth was looking at the minister with the
grave and intent regard of a physician towards his patient. But, in
spite of this outward show, the latter was almost convinced of the old
man’s knowledge, or, at least, his confident suspicion, with respect to
his own interview with Hester Prynne. The physician knew then that in
the minister’s regard he was no longer a trusted friend, but his
bitterest enemy. So much being known, it would appear natural that a
part of it should be expressed. It is singular, however, how long a
time often passes before words embody things; and with what security
two persons, who choose to avoid a certain subject, may approach its
very verge, and retire without disturbing it. Thus the minister felt no
apprehension that Roger Chillingworth would touch, in express words,
upon the real position which they sustained towards one another. Yet
did the physician, in his dark way, creep frightfully near the secret.
“Were it not better,” said he, “that you use my poor skill tonight?
Verily, dear sir, we must take pains to make you strong and vigorous
for this occasion of the Election discourse. The people look for great
things from you, apprehending that another year may come about and find
their pastor gone.”
“Yes, to another world,” replied the minister with pious resignation.
“Heaven grant it be a better one; for, in good sooth, I hardly think to
tarry with my flock through the flitting seasons of another year! But
touching your medicine, kind sir, in my present frame of body I need it
not.”
“I joy to hear it,” answered the physician. “It may be that my
remedies, so long administered in vain, begin now to take due effect.
Happy man were I, and well deserving of New England’s gratitude, could
I achieve this cure!”
“I thank you from my heart, most watchful friend,” said the Reverend
Mr. Dimmesdale with a solemn smile. “I thank you, and can but requite
your good deeds with my prayers.”
“A good man’s prayers are golden recompense!” rejoined old Roger
Chillingworth, as he took his leave. “Yea, they are the current gold
coin of the New Jerusalem, with the King’s own mint mark on them!”
Left alone, the minister summoned a servant of the house, and requested
food, which, being set before him, he ate with ravenous appetite. Then
flinging the already written pages of the Election Sermon into the
fire, he forthwith began another, which he wrote with such an impulsive
flow of thought and emotion, that he fancied himself inspired; and only
wondered that Heaven should see fit to transmit the grand and solemn
music of its oracles through so foul an organ pipe as he. However,
leaving that mystery to solve itself, or go unsolved for ever, he drove
his task onward with earnest haste and ecstasy.
Thus the night fled away, as if it were a winged steed, and he
careering on it; morning came, and peeped, blushing, through the
curtains; and at last sunrise threw a golden beam into the study, and
laid it right across the minister’s bedazzled eyes. There he was, with
the pen still between his fingers, and a vast, immeasurable tract of
written space behind him!
XXI.